How do I explain my need to kill you every time your lips whisper that word to him. Why do I feel the need to rip out your tongue with pliers; your tongue of deceit, your tongue of passion. I hate you. I hate you because I love you. I detest you because I cannot live without you.

Why do you do these things to me? Why can’t you just go and never come back? Get out. I can’t say those words, even though I long to push you out myself. Why do you play with my heart so? Why did you give it away? Wasn’t I fine with it intact? Wasn’t I content as the Black Widow? The Ice Queen? The Moaning Myrtle of my own private universe? You gave it away because of the L-word.

Do you hate me this much? It’s the only way to explain why you’ve treated me so. Why you’ve betrayed me in this way. Betrayer! Traitor! Look at me when I’m talking to you! You sold me out! And the delight you get from his attentions? The feeling you classify as awesome when he decides to throw a little attention to you? The crushing sadness you feel when he’s not there? ALL RUBBISH! You’re not even afraid they may be lies. Trusting fool!

Should I end this? You know I can and there’s nothing you can do! What would it be? Wrist slitting or a noose? Why should I anyway! I’d just be proving you right in your twisted way. Is there no winning? Are you that hopeless? Pathetic little thing! Fine! Let’s sit down and wait for him. Let’s wait for him to acknowledge your existence again. I’d just sit here and laugh at you; laugh at your mock fights. Laugh at your hurt feelings when he eventually shreds that heart you’ve given to him!
Let’s wait!

Silly fool.
Yes, you! You beady-eyed girl staring at me as a reflection from this mirror!
Have you no answer now? Cat got your tongue? Looking back at me foolishly.
Let’s wait!
I’d be proved right and when you cry, I’d be laughing.
Laughing and crying as I end our lives to save us from your stupid, stupid, mistake.
Baka girl.