Maybe I’m regretting leaving my real writing alone for the month a little but I’ve made the decision and I shall stick with it!


1. Bragging by guys.

“I’ve shagged her.” “I’m a boss” “I use the latest Bold”…SHUT UP! Yeah we know you’re so awesome! Dead it already. Most of them show-offs still live with their parents! Nigga please! And fondling your househelp doesn’t count as being sexually active! Even those who don’t even know what a vagina looks like would be bragging about hitting it. Nna biko go siddon! \__

2. Corporate Begging.

This one applies to some girls. ‘Invoicing’. “Buy me a Louboutin shoe” “Buy me weave” buy buy buy! You’re a beggar! Your personal income can’t afford a curve and you’re demanding for an iPad2. Infact, you’re a thief too! Your father doesn’t own a car yet you want a boyfriend who’s car has an AC. Isn’t your destiny on top of Mount Sinai? What happened to being independent and standing on your two feet? Sleeping with men for material gain na Ashawo work no be so? Corporate beggars. Taa! Cut your coat according to your cloak!

3. Guys that ‘buy’ babes

“Chioma if you date me I swear I’d buy you everything you desire!” <- true life scenario yo! I don’t blame the guy; or guys that do that. I blame the chics in number 2 that have cheapened babes. Infact no. 2 and 3 fit! Bloody irritants!
Since when did I look hungry or deprived that you want to buy me the whole world…if I date you!
The dude in question was looking for a shag buddy! Me, shag buddy for money? Kpenta hekwa gi onu!
You cannot buy some girls. Some of us know our worth. We are not interested in your wealth. Go flash your cash to the hungry girls out there! Baka! I’m not overly rich. I can’t afford to buy fancy gadgets but I would rather die than accept them from a guy in exchange for whatever favour, present or future! My life wouldn’t end if I don’t have them so Negro chill!

4. Snobby People

Snobby people, you irritate me! Its everywhere! Real life and Virtual life. Yes, I’m referring to Twitter when I say virtual life. Wetin una dey feel like sef! Babes be forming sexy because ya breast is the size of two cows. They don wash u finish u come dey do levels. Some guys too would be feeling good with themselves because you manage fine small. Or maybe you went to a private school and suddenly everyone is beneath you. Your father is rich, you parade with his car, forming levels. You never pay bill na why.
I really hate snobs. I hate people that look down on others. It’s bullying! You never know what would happen! Watch it!

5. Can’t think of a 5th now.

I think I’ve said enough.
If you don’t like it, you fit try Senpukku. Plank ontop knife ok? Baka.

See you tomorrow!